In Honor of the New Year

In honor of the new year (almost a month in already), I want to take this opportunity to reflect on my 2022 and the part that Fulbright has played and will play in my life.

Whether you’re reading this as a friend, a potential Fulbrighter, or an anonymous viewer, one thing you should know is that 2022 was an incredibly difficult year for me. It wasn’t a completely terrible year, and there wasn’t one thing that happened that made it difficult, but it was a year of immense transition. However, even though it was the toughest year, it was also the most eventful I’ve had in my 22 years on this earth.

I finished my last year of college, graduated with my friends, traveled to Italy, moved out of New York, packed my bags and flew to Africa, got malaria twice, and started this Fulbright adventure.

I was able to spend my Christmas and New Years with my family in Paris, and I have never been so thankful to see them. While my Fulbright experience has been full of excitement and new experiences, it has also been incredibly challenging. I have felt isolated from my friends at home, my friends here, and the locals. I have had to deeply examine my identity, especially as it relates to my new community and the place I fill in society. As an American, specifically as a White American, coming to CI, you are automatically treated with a higher respect and given privileges that you may not have earned. And while I feel uncomfortable at times with the way I am so highly regarded, it is also rude to not accept gifts and kind behavior when they are offered.

All that being said, while I am still in the midst of my Fulbright journey, I am glad to enter this new year. I hope that I will be able to leave behind some of the anxiety, confusion, and isolation that has developed in my first months because I really want to enjoy and appreciate the time I have here.

I never would have thought a year ago that I would be living in CI now, experiencing the world from this new lens, and I know that it is a truly unique experience. So, despite the feelings of isolation or anxiety, I plan to approach 2023 with an open mind. To savor the moments with my friends and colleagues, because I know they are fleeting. I took a trip this past weekend with John and Dominique to Korhogo (Northern CI), and the first night I was so stressed and sad. It was hot where I was sleeping, and I saw a cockroach, and all I could think was that I wanted to be back in my bed, in my room. But then the next morning, we took an early hike up Mt. Korhogo and saw the view of the city and the desert, and I realized that these are moments I won’t ever get back. And while I know it’s easy to get stuck on what I miss and the things I don’t have, I will try to remind myself each day that life should be about appreciating where you are now. My Fulbright will be over before I know it, so I hope I feel like I truly lived the experience and didn’t let the small moments pass me by.

The view from Mt. Korhogo